Hi! Thank you for being here and taking the time to read this. My name is Ashley Czesak. I am a 38 year-old female, married with two boys (9 and 6) and a 2 year old adopted pup. I am a mental health therapist/psychotherapist, clinician, social worker, etc. When most people ask “what do you do” I say “I am a therapist” they say “oh what kind, like a physical therapist”. So hence all my titles above. I have a bachelor’s degree in psychology and a Masters in Social Work. No, social workers are not only what you see on television. Social workers actually provide more psychotherapy than any other profession. We do not just work in foster care or the division of child protection and permanency (yes, we can do that too).
So how did I get into this? Although some may look back on their high school career fondly, I do not have the same experience. I moved to another town at the start of 8th grade. Yes, the town was only 15 minutes away, but it may as well have been 15 states away. Starting as the “new kid” in middle school sucked. My parents were recently divorced and then we moved out of our childhood home into a small apartment. I moved to a condo in a section of the town that was known as “where the poor kids live” or at least that’s what the 13 year old kids told me. Fast forward to high school, I was depressed, anxious, and had poor self-esteem. There was a SAC (Student Assistant Counselor) who was my saving grace. She was amazing. She helped me find a private therapist outside of school and I began my healing journey. It was those difficult moments as a freshman in high school that I realized this is what I want to do. I want to help others who feel like me.
That is what I did! I took a roundabout way of arriving at this destination and quite honestly, I still do not think it is my final destination, but it’s a comfortable place to be for me. I obtained my bachelor’s degree in psychology and began working in the field. My second job post undergrad was at Care Plus NJ. I tell everyone – I grew up there. I had the opportunity to work in so many different programs and gain so much experience that further led me on the path I needed. I enrolled in grad school while working full-time and interning. Private practice was always my dream, since those high school days.
Purposely, I got pregnant my last year of grad school and welcomed by first child the summer after graduation. I always thought I would go back to work and continue my career at Care Plus. Upon returning from maternity leave my entire perspective changed. I just was not passionate about the direct work I was doing, I desperately wanted to bond with my new baby, and needed all my clinical hours. FUN FACT: once you graduate with your masters it’s not over. You need to take a provisional license exam THEN get supervised for 2-3 years to obtain 1,800 clinical hours, take another exam, submit your application to the board to hopefully, FINALLY be approved as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW). So, one week back from maternity I sat crying in my office and crunching numbers. One of the good things about Care Plus is that there are lots of per diem opportunities. So, I crunched those numbers and proposed to my husband that if I quit, I could make the same money working half the hours. That is what I did. I spent all day (until 3pm) with my son and then worked 3-9 and some Saturday’s. I got all my clinical hours, took the exam, and submitted my application to the board. Then, I got pregnant again.
Let me backtrack a moment. Shortly after having my son I had this AHH HA moment where I realized I wanted to work with women. Becoming a mom was challenging to say the least. I am fortunate enough to say that my husband and I had/have a rock-solid marriage and we wanted and planned for our little one. Even so, it was HARD. So hard. I remember thinking why does no one tell you this. In fact, while I was on maternity leave, I went to a work event with colleagues and it was the first time these challenges were ever discussed or normalized. I left with happy tears of relief…thank goodness, I am not alone – other mental health professionals have felt the way I do. I was anxious. This was another reminder – yes, this is what you need to do and focus on. Shout from the rooftops that being a mom is hard! Not to mention, do you go back to work? Do you stay home? What are the ramifications of each? Since a week postpartum I knew this was my focus. Then, somewhere in between my two children I had some medical issues (different story for a different day) that led to what I thought were fertility issues and landed me at a fertility doctor. After lots of tests and a surgery, I was told I was fine and could have children. I got pregnant right away only to find out it was an ectopic pregnancy.
Why am I sharing so much personal information you may ask? Some therapists have really strict boundaries (totally respect that) and do not disclose any personal information. I share what I can, when I think it is appropriate or helpful to my clients, my potential clients, my friends, strangers on the internet, so you all know that I am not just some robot therapist. I am a human being who has been through a lot – just like all of you. I just so happen to have channeled these difficult moments into good and have equipped myself with ways to support others experiencing similar challenges.
Fast forward to now – yay! I submitted my application, passed my LCSW exam, and am pregnant with my second child. My husband announces that he got a promotion at work and if I want to stay home with my kids I can be a SAHM. Music to my ears at that this point in time. I was exhausted. I was so fortunate to have had as much time as possible with my first, but I wanted more. So, I became someone I never imaged I would be. Not because there is anything wrong with that, it’s just not something I ever thought I wanted. I figured I would use my time home to soak in my babies and then figure out how on earth I am going to open my own practice and focus on women’s mental health and moms and fertility and loss, etc.
For the first time in my life, I allowed myself to just focus on one thing and that was my children. I was that mom singing in music classes, pushing kids on the swings, going down slides, making obscene faces and noises in public just to get my babies to laugh. I rocked mommy and me classes, sweatpants became the new (and best) wardrobe, reading materials were parenting blogs and books. It was the best (and difficult in its own way) time. Again – another story for another day.
Somewhere along the line I started getting my ducks in a row. I found PSI (Perinatal Support International) I was fortunate enough to have met some great friends throughout my career who were always supportive and helpful when it came to encouraging me in starting my practice. I was close a few times over those years. In fact, I met a mom who graciously connected me with her husband who owned his own practice, and I got my feet wet again working for him. Everything happens for a reason because two weeks after starting with him, COVID hit and the world shut down. Just like every other parent, no one expected to be home schooling and navigating all the challenges COVID brought on. I saw a few virtual clients for a year or so and then finally, the world was somewhat returning to normalcy and my baby was going to full-day pre-school. With the support of friends and family I opened my own practice November 1st, 2021.
If you have read this far, bear with me, I am almost at the end. I was a nervous new business owner hoping I could keep the lights on in my tiny little office. Thankfully, I was pleasantly surprised that with little to no advertising clients were reaching out. I LOVE therapy and think that everyone and anyone can benefit, but since becoming a mom I started exploring health and wellness in any form I could find it. This included music, journaling, reading, yoga, nature, holistic medicine, nutrition. I wanted to find a way to tie all this together. I was quickly full with clients and realized I wanted to help more people. This is when I decided to expand my private practice. Here we are today. I am so humbled and excited to share that I have opened Your Path to Empowerment, a wellness center with therapy at the core that specializes in women’s mental health. I have moved to a new space and in the upcoming months we will be offering therapy and so much more!
Thank you for reading and supporting me. Please stay tuned for more health and wellness tips, upcoming workshops and events. Remember – you matter!
All my love,
Ashley
